Let's Talk About Love - Lydia Waruszynski, M.Ed- couples counseling, sex & relationship education
  • Home
  • Lydia W.
  • Reservations
  • Contact
  • Blog
  • Home
  • Lydia W.
  • Reservations
  • Contact
  • Blog

And They Worked For a Happily Ever After

2/13/2022

0 Comments

 
Picture
It’s Valentine’s day…so let’s talk about love, shall we:-)



One of the best books I have ever read about loving well is called The Art of Loving by Erich Fromm.  Written almost seventy years ago, the premise  still holds true today: “as with every art, love demands practice and concentration, as well as genuine insight and understanding.” In other words, love is a skill. And because we live in a society where the cultural mythology still casts love as something that happens to us, especially something magical we “fall into”, our failure to recognize this skillfulness aspect is perhaps the primary reason why love is so often laced with frustration and disappointment.


However, skillfulness doesn’t mean “Not meant to be”.


This is one of the most destructive beliefs about relationships: the assumption that we love instinctually.  Every relationship takes an effort to keep it healthy and strong. We choose to love.  Actually, a no-effort relationship is not a great relationship, and most-likely feels like a “two ships passing in the night” type of relationship... often very lonely, and without lasting significance. Lest we forget, the quality of our lives depends on the quality we put into our relationships.


Putting effort in a relationship basically means making space in your heart for someone else: 





  • Effort in a relationship is about putting energy into growing with your partner 
 
  • Effort in a relationship is about caring to make your partner feel special 
 
  • Effort in a relationship is wanting to learn about your partner’s vulnerabilities 
 
  • Effort in a relationship is about creating shared meaning and friendship 
 
  • Effort in a relationship is about listening and connecting through conflict  
 
  • Effort in a relationship is about practicing repair and forgiveness


The true art of loving is never passive. It is curious and creative. It is willful and intentional. It is imbued with responsibility.  Love is a verb.  To love is:  

  • to  do 
 
  • to  choose
 
  • to  care 
 
  • to  feel 
 
  • to  work  
 
  • to  become.




And to meet each other halfway.


Happy Valentine's Day,

​Lydia


​
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Hi, I'm Lydia- a modern-day warrior of the heart with a mission to reconcile the mystery and mastery of Love.

    Archives

    December 2022
    May 2022
    February 2022
    December 2021
    March 2021
    January 2021
    August 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    March 2019
    December 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    June 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    August 2017
    May 2017
    December 2016
    October 2016
    August 2016
    May 2016
    August 2015
    June 2015
    January 2015
    October 2014
    July 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014

    RSS Feed

Workshops

REALationships
Really Engaged
Eat-Play-Love
Sex on the Menu
Marriage Interrupted
Family Matters

About us

Lydia W.
Reservations
Video
Podcasts
Blog

Where to find us

Contact
Rave Reviews

Partners
© COPYRIGHT 2023. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.